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THE PICCOLO 



"■ ' ' -^~' T 




- ■ - "^ ^~ ■ 



^ ^^-.^ -...>. :»■■>. 




BOOKS FOR GIRLS 


By 


Laura E. R-ichards 


H6e 


MARGARET SERIES 




^ 


Three Margarets 


] 


Wa-rgaret Montfort 




Peggy 




R.ita 




Fernley House 


-^he 


HILDEGARDE SERIES 




^ 


Queen Hildegarde 


H 


ildega^rde's Holiday 




Hildegarde's Home 




Hildegarde's Neighbors 




Hildega^rde's Ha.rvest 


DANA ESTES (Bk. COMPANY 




Publishers 


Estes 


Press, Summer St., Boston 



PICCOLO 



BY 



ICaura IE. UtrljarbB 

JluthoT of 

'The Hurdy-Gurdy," "Captain January," "Queen Hildegarde," 

"Five cTVIinute Stories," etc. 




Boston rt? DANA ESTES CS, 
COMPANY * ^ Publishers 



J 



IS 



LIBRARY ot CONGRF.SS 
Two Conip? Received 

JUN 8 1906 

,LASS (J X.-Xc. No, 



Copyright, igo6 
Dana Estes & Company 



All rights reserved 



THE PICCOLO 

Published, 1906 



"Pr " 



'.TT^ 



^ 






Colonial ^rcss 

Electrotyped and Printed by C. H. Simonds & Cc 
Boston. U. S. A. 




^^CD 



'^ 



TO 
MY DAUGHTER 










PAGE 


The Piccolo 15 


The Ballad or Ki-Yoodle 


> • 




. 17 


Coming from the Fair . 


• 




20 


Garden Song 


f , 




. 26 


Summer Song ..... 


J ^ 




. 28 


Bird Song 


^ 




30 


The Windflower .... 


, ^ 




32 


The Auction 


, 




34 


A Ballad of Yucatan . 


, , 




. 37 


A Discussion 


1 • 




40 


The Gingham Umbrella .... 


, 




42 


The Panhellenic Pelican 


. « 




44 


Some of the Tales That I Shall Tell 


When I ] 


Have 




Time Enough .... 


. 




47 


The Gongo and the Shongo . 


. 




49 


The Suffering Unicorn .... 


. 




61 


An Interesting "Walk 


. ) 




64 


The Disappointing Tea-party 


. 




58 


The Contumacious Troglodyte 


, 




64 


Curious Creatures ... 


. 




66 


Notes on the North American Indian 




. 61 


The Twoggle-Cum-Twig 




. 68 


xiii 









CONTENTS 

PAGE 

Concerning the Nobility 70 

In Foreign Parts 72 

Some Singular Statements 75 

Some Families of My Acquaintance .... 76 

A Spanish Ballad .79 

The Armadillo 80 

Fancy Dress . . * 83 

Mr. Peter -Pook 84 

Sleepy Song .85 

Grippe 88 

The Squirrel of Central Park . . . . .92 

Suppositions . .94 

The jMeadow Song 96 

Nevermore 98 

After a Visit to the Natural History Museum . 100 

Desert Song . . 104 

A Brief Ballad of Araby . . . . . . 106 

The Tables Turned 108 

A Suggestion 110 

The Sad Tale op Mr. Bobster and Miss Prawny 

Prim . 115 

Jeremi' and Josephine 118 

The Uncle ©f Cato Theophilus Jones . . . 120 



XIV 



THE PICCOLO 



THE PICCOLO 



"piCCOLO'S a little pipe, 

-■- Will you hear me play on it ? 

Age may have me in his gripe, 

Still I toot awav on it. 
Children, come and dance with me ! 
Merry moments you shall see ; 
Life's a jinking jollity, 

All the childish way on it ! 

Piccolo's a little pipe ; 

Will you learn to play on it ? 
Wait until your years are ripe, 

Then you'll say your say on it. 
15 




THE PICCOLO 



Youth may strive and youth may sigh, 
Manhood build both broad and high, 
Age and childhood, you and I, 
Still we'll have our way on it ! 




THE PICCOLO 



THE BALLAD OF KI-YOODLE 

nnHEEE was a boy lived in a room, 
-'- Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
He had a horse called Billy Broom, 
With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

He rode this horsey every day, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
'Twas now to fight and now to play, 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

He rode him to the corner north, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle. 

There came a monstrous giant forth, 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 
17 




THE PICCOLO 

The boy he drew his sword so true, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
And ran the giant through and through, 

With a Hnkum tinkum toodle ! 

He rode him to the corner south, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle. 
And rode right into a dragon's mouth, 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

The boy he drew his sword so true, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
And cut the dragon right in two, 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

He rode him to the corner east, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle. 
And there he met a hideous beast. 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 
18 



THE PICCOLO 



The boy he drew his sword so true, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
And soon the beast was lost to view, 

With a Hnkum tinkum toodle ! 

He rode him to the corner west, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
And met the one he loved the best, 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

Then round her neck his arms he threw, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 
And vowed he was her knight so true. 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 

Kow that's the way a boy should play, 

Ki-yoodle, oh ! ki-yoodle, 

And love his Mammy every day. 

With a linkum tinkum toodle ! 
19 








THE PICCOLO 



COMING FEOM THE FAIR 

T^O you come from the Fair, 
-■-^ Mr. Jimmy, Mr. Johnny ? 
Do you come from the Fair, 

Mr. John and Mr. Jim ? 
And what saw you there 
That was blithe and that was bonny, 

With your natty little hatty 

And your trousers trim ? 




THE PICCOLO 

Yes, we come from the Fair, 

Mistress Annie, Mistress Jenny ! 

Yes, we come from the Fair, 

Mistress Jane and Mistress Anne ! 

But to tell you plain and true, 

We saw nought so fair as you, 

With your ruffles and your puffles, 
And your gay feather fan ! 



But what did you buy, 
Mr. Jimmy, Mr. Johnny ? 

But what did you buy, 
Mr. John and Mr. Jim ? 

Were there brooches to be bought ? 

Were there spangles to be sought ? 
With your natty little hatty 
And your trousers trim ! 



21 




THE PICCOLO 

Wedding-rings did we buy, 

Mistress Annie, Mistress Jenny ! 
Wedding-rings did we buy, 

Mistress Jane and Mistress Anne ! 
So if you will put them on, 
To the church let us be gone, 

And we'll join our hands together, 

Little wife, little man ! 



22 



f 










■ 1 ■' 



TEE PICCOLO 



GAEDEN SONG 

O ING a song of gardens ; 
^^ Time is come for sowing ; 
Trees are out, bees are out, 

Apple-blooms are blowing. 
Pansy-buds, poppy-buds, 

Spring is here indeed, 
When my man Johnny comes 

AloDg with his seed. 

Sing a song of gardens ; 

Pusley and pigweed ; 
Hoe 'em down, mow 'em down, 

Every small and big weed ! 
25 



THE PICCOLO 



Wormwood, vetch and burdock, 

All of them must go, 
When my man Johnny comes 



Along with his hoe. 




Sing a song of gardens, 

Summer sun is burning ; 
Lilies droop, roses stoop, 

Long for night's returning. 
Think they see an angel 

With a cheek of tan, 
When my man Johnny comes 

Along with his can. 



Sing a song of gardens : 

All a blaze of bloom, 

Jasmine and gillyflower 

Elbowing for room. 
26 



THE PICCOLO 

Summer's come, summer's come, 

Sure as sure can be, 
When my man Johnny brings 

My posy in to me. 




THE PICCOLO 



SUMMEE SONG 

XJEOOK, brook, come along, 
-^-^ Kun along with me ! 
Such a merry playfellow 

You are sure to be. 
You can dance, I can dance, 

Both of us can sing: 
Tirili, tirili. 

Ting, ting, ting ! 

Brook, brook, come aloug, 

Eun along with me ! 
Jewel-weed, jimson-weed, 

Pretty things to see. 
28 



THE PICCOLO 

You can splash, I can splash, 
Both of us can sing : 

TiriH, tirili. 

Ting, ting, ting ! 

Brook, brook, come along, 

Eun along with me ! 
Deary me ! I've tumbled in ! 

What a sight to see ! 
You are wet, I am wet, 

Still we both can sing, 
Tirili, tirili, 

Ting, ting, ting ! 




j'osei^>^/Ne."B?au7rg' 



THE PICCOLO 



BIED SONG 

rriHE robin sings of willow-buds, 
-*- Of snowflakes on the green ; 
The bluebird sings of Mayflowers, 

The crackling leaves between ; 
The veery has a thousand tales 

To tell to girl and boy ; 
But the oriole, the oriole, 

Sings, " Joy I joy ! joy ! " 

The pee wee calls his little mate, 

Sweet Phoebe, gone astray ; 

The warbler sings, " What fun, what fun. 

To tilt upon the spray ! " 
30 




THE PICCOLO 

The cuckoo has no song, but clucks, 

Like any wooden toy ; 
But the oriole, the oriole, 

Sings, "Joy! joy! joy!" 

The grosbeak sings the rose's birth. 

And paints her on his breast ; 
The sparrow sings of speckled eggs, 

Soft brooded in the nest. 
The woodthrush sings of peace, " Sweet peace. 

Sweet peace," without alloy ; 
But the oriole, the oriole, 

Sings, " Joy ! joy ! joy ! " 



^^^ 




THE PICCOLO 



THE WINDFLOWEE 

TTTINDFLOWEE, windflower, 
* ' Dance with me ! 
This way, that way, 

Under the tree. 
Lift up your toe, dear, 

Point it so, dear ; 
Whirl about, twirl about, 

Frolic and free. 




Windflower, windflower, 
Tell me things I 

How do the butterflies 
Paint their wings ? 

32 



THE PICCOLO 

Why do the beetles 

Keep theirs shut up ? 
Who drinks out of 

The harebell's cup ? 

Windflower, windflower, 

Tell me more ! 
Who puts the sweet 

In the Mly's core ? 
Why does Hepatica dress in fur ? 

Shouldn't you think 
'Twould be hot for her ? 



Windflower, windflower, 

Kiss me, quick ! 
I'll never hurt you, 

I'll never pick ; 
But just we'll be glad. 

And just we'll be good, 

I in the house. 

And you in the wood. 
33 




THE PICCOLO 




THE AUCTION 

FF to the auction went little Dame Trottaway, 
(Heigh-ho ! poor little dame ! ) 
Many and singular objects she bro't away, 
(Heigh-ho ! woe for the same ! ) 

A three-legged chair and a two-legged tea-table, 

(Heigh-ho ! crazy and queer ! ) 
" Mend them up cannily, sure I shall be able ! 

(Heigh-ho 1 clever, my dear ! ) " 

A clock and a chum and a lovely tomato-can, 

(Heigh-ho ! painted so gay ! ) 

" Happy am I, in these pleasures take part who can, 

(Heigh-ho ! joy fullest day ! ) " 

34 



THE PICCOLO 

A broken-nosed jug and a portrait of somebody, 

(Heigh-ho 1 ugly old thing ! ) 
" Looks like a crabbed and crusty and dumb body, 

(Heigh-ho ! sadly I sing ! ) " 

" Cannot keep silence, however I try for it, 

(Heigh-ho ! carried away ! ) 
' Who'll give me fifty ? ' and ' I, if I die for it ! ' 

(Heigh-ho ! madly I say.) " 




THE PICCOLO 

Dippers and mugs and a beautiful feather-bed, 

(Heigh-ho ! month of July ! ) 
" Pleasant and soft it will be for my nether bed, 

(Heigh-ho ! think I shall cry !) " 

Back from the auction went little Dame Trottaway, 

(Heigh-ho ! shaking her head.) 
" Something of wisdom at least I have bro't away ; 

(Heigh-ho ! wish I were dead ! ) " 




36 



I 



THE PICCOLO 



A BALLAD OF YUCATAN 

"FN Yucatan, in Yucatan, 

-*- There dwelt a pale primeval Man, 

Who daily his addresses paid 

Unto an arch aud Aztec maid. 

It gave him pain from top. to toe. 

It made him scream, he loved her so. 



This Aztec maid no father ^ had, 
Nor mother ^ either, which was sad ; 
But when she wished abroad to roam, 
And leave her arch and Aztec home, 
She visited in Yucatan 
The aunt ^ of the primeval Man. 

1 But she had had them. All authorities agree upou the ex- 
istence of parents in prehistoric times. 

2 They had aunts, too. 

37 



THE PICCOLO 

The man remarked, *' My lovely Fair, 
Behold that stately temple there 1 
If you agree, our friends we'll rally 
To meet us at the teocalli, 
And you'll become, my dearest Life, 
My own, my arch, my Aztec wife." 




« Not so ! " the maid replied ; " I fear 
The kind of wedlock practised here. 
Late, late yestreen I marked the strife 
Between your uncle ^ and his wife ; 
She broke his head, and on the floor 
She left him weltering in his gore. 

iFrom the acknowledged presence of aunts, we may reason- 
ably infer that of uncles. 



. _- .f. 




I 



THE PICCOLO 

If we should wed, and then repine, 
Such painful lot might then be mine. 
My nerves most sadly it would shake 
If I should be obUged to break, 
In righteous wrath or dismal dole, 
My pale primeval partner's poll. 

" Nay ! nay ! in Aztec Land I'll seek 
A husband milky-mild and meek. 
Who'll ne'er his hands in gore imbrue. 
But speak when he is spoken to, 
And — " here the lover, growing bolder. 
Caught up, and threw her o'er his shoulder, 
And bore her off heroically. 
And wed her in the teocalli. 
And she, for blessiug or for ban, 
Was Mrs. Pale Primeval Man. 



39 



THE PICCOLO 



A DISCUSSION 

TT7E sat round the fire one winter night, 

My dear little boys and I, 
And we talked of men that were wise and good. 
And of things that were great and high. 

Thomas looked up from his history book, 

And slowly and thoughtfully, 
" I wonder, since ever the world began, 

What's the greatest invention," quoth he. 

Then rose such a chatter, a cry and a clatter, 
You'd think they were monkeys, not boys ; 




i 



THE PICCOLO 

For this one was squeaking, and that one was 
shrieking ; 
The room seemed to shake with their noise.' 

Jimmy said, " Gunpowder ! " Teddy said, " Squirts ! " 
" Candy 1 " cried Billy Bolee. 
" Printing ! " said John, as he lovingly glanced 
At the book, where it lay on his knee. 

" Trousers ! " said Timothy, just out of kilts. 

" Root beer ! " cried fat little Joe. 

" Fireworks ! " " Steam-engines ! " " Telegraph ! " 

" Skates ! " 

" Children ! Ma said they were ; so ! " 

Then out spoke Tim Tiny, who sat in my lap. 

As he raised from my shoulder his head. 
" I t'ink " — and he rubbed both the sleepy blue 

eyes — 
" Ze greatest invention is — bed ! " 

41 




THE PICCOLO 



THE GINGHAM UMBEELLA 

A LESSON IN POLITENESS 

A LPHONSO, Alphonso, Alphonso and Arabella 
^^-*^ They happened to meet 

A man in the street, 
Who carried a gingham umbrella. 

Alphonso possessed neither manners nor grace, 
He made at this person a hideous face ; 
But how different the conduct of sweet Arabella, 
Who praised with politeness the gingham umbrella. 

The man was a nobleman, deeply disguised ; 
The compliment courteous he pointedly prized ; 
" Sweet creature," he said, " come away from this feller. 
And take both my heart and my gingham umbrella ! " 

42 



THE PICCOLO 

Th^ very next morning they met in the church, 

And foolish Alphonso was left in the lurch ; 

For they said, " In the future you'll know how to 

tell a 
Great lord from a loon, by his gingham umbrella ! " 



43 




THE PICCOLO 



THE PANHELLENIC PELICAN 

■ 4 PANHELLENIC Pelican, 
■^^^^ He wished to climb up Helicon, 
To get some Hasty Jellycon 

That grew upon the top ; 
The thought so filled his noddle, sir, 
That off he went a-waddle, sir ; 
He did not care a boddle, sir, 

For those who bade him stop. 

So then, 

He filled his pipe with nourishment. 

To give him some encourishment, 

He made a frisky flourish ment 

With leg and eke with wing ; 
44 






I 



THE PICCOLO 

So loudly he did squeak away, 
He frightened every Greek away ; 
They fled with leap and shriek away, ^ 
And yelled like anything. 

Bid unfortunately , 

The rocks began to craggify, 
His spirits 'gan to flaggify. 
His steps began to laggify 

Along the climbing track ; 
And when he saw the chasms there, 
He had most horrid spasms there, 
And ate some cataplasms ^ there, 

To bring his courage back. 

But, alack! and 

Alas ! they were not good for him ; 
A most improper food for him ; 

1 The Cataplasma, or Mustard-plaster Tree, is said to grow 
iu those parts, but I never believed it myself. 

45 






THE PICCOLO 




I've always understood for him 

It was a fatal feast ; 
For he tumbled down a waterfall, 
y A vastly ghastly sort o' fall ; 
No pelican had orter ^ fall 

In this way in the least. 

1 This spelling is extremely incorrect, the grammar too ; but 
I know the right way, and I hope you do ! 



46 



THE PICCOLO 






SOME OF THE TALES THAT I SHALL TELL 
WHEN I HAVE TIME ENOUGH 

rilHE tale of the Yammering Yogi, 
-*- The suffering Sufi Saint ; 
The tale of the Blundering Bogy, 

Who swallowed the purple paint ; 
The tale of the Lolloping Llamas, 
Who went out to tea in pajamas, 
While visiting in the Bahamas. 

(The people all thought it quaint ! ) 

The tale of the Elegant Eagle 

Who bought him a wig ; (he was bald ! ) 

The tale of the Bottle-nosed Beagle 
Who never knew what he was called. 
47 




THE PICCOLO 

The tale of the Hideous Hiudoo, 
Who put his head out of the windoo ; 
The people all said, " Take it in, do ! 
We really are quite appalled ! " 



THE PICQOLO 



THE GONGO AND THE SHONGO 

nnHE Gongo, the Gongo, he lives in the East ; 
-^ He is a most horrible, torrible beast. 
His teeth they are tusky, 
His howls they are husky, 
He'll gobble you up, and not mind in the least. 

The Shongo, the Shongo, how different is he ! 

His diet is nothing but toast-crumbs and tea : 

But he sits and makes faces 

In perilous places, 

And sometimes (they say), he is frightful to see. 

The people who live in that country, I hear, 
Eegard these two creatures with fluttering fear ; 

49 






II i 



THE PICCOLO 

And when through the jungle they're strolling 

along, 
They keep up their spirits by singing this song. 

SONG 

Air; "Comin' through the Rye." 

If a Gongo 

Met a Shongo, 

Coming home to tea ; 

If a Gongo 

Ate a Shongo, 

Happy should we be ! 

In the jungle 

Should you bungle, 

Chance upon the pair, 

Set the Gongo 

On the Shongo, 

Eun and leave them there ! 

50 





THE PICCOLO 



THE SUFFERING UNICORN 







^NCE there was a Unicorn, 
Hi, ho, hi, ho ! 
Had a toothache in his horn, 

Hi, ho, hum 1 
Had a toothache in his horn, 
Made him weep and made him mourn. 
Wished he never had been born. 
Hi, ho, hum ! 

To a dentist off he went. 

Hi, ho, hi, ho ! 
Asked him would he kindly dent, 

Hi, ho, hum ! 

61 




THE PICCOLO 

" Look ! it turns me green and yellow. 
Hark ! it makes me howl and bellow. 
Pull it out, my dental fellow, 
Hi, ho, hum ! " 

Dentist pulled and dentist hauled, 

Hi, ho, hi, ho ! 
All his brother dentists called. 

Hi, ho, hum ! 
Pulled him from the dental chair, 
Dragged him here and dragged him there, 
Couldn't stir it, not a hair, 

Hi, ho, hum ! 



Unicorn at first was sad. 

Hi, ho, hi, ho ! 

Unicorn at last was mad, 

Hi, ho, hum ! 

52 



THE PICCOLO 

Bellowing with rage and scorn, 
Leaping like a Capricorn, 
Jabbed them with his aching horn, 
Hi, ho, hum ! 

Chased them up and down the room, 

Hi, ho, hi, ho ! 
He in glory, they in gloom. 

Hi, ho, hum ! 
Then, the business to complete, 
Kicked them out into the street, 
Chuckling, " Eevenge is sweet ! " 

Hi, ho, hum ! 



53 




THE PICCOLO 



AN INTERESTING WALK 



ME. LITTLE, Mr. Small, 
Mr. Short and Mr. Tall, 
Went a-walking out one day. 
On the high and public way. 
And they met with Mr. Stout, 
Mr. Grim and Mr. Grout, 
Mr. Swift and Mr. Strong, 
Mr. Light and Mr. Long, 
And they said, " I pray you say, 
Saw you aught of Mr. Gay, 
Mr. Smart and Mr. Keene, 
Mr. Brown and Mr. Green ? 
Mr. Sterne and Mr. Sweet, 
They would make our joy complete, 

54 



THE PICCOLO 



Mr. Fair and Mr. Bright 

Would be gladsome to our sight, 

And no grief our hearts could ravage 

Had we only Mr. Savage, 

Though indeed we still should lack 

Mr. White and Mr. Black, 

Mr. Gray and Mr. Blue, 

Those companions tried and true ! " 

But the others answered " Nay ! 
None of these we've seen to-day : 
But we met with Mr. Priest, 
Who was riding on a beast, 
Mr. Pope and Mr. Prior, 
Mr. Knight and Mr. Squire, 
Mr. Prince and Mr. King, 
Pushing on like anything. 
Hasting after Mr. Sharp, 
Who was playing on the harp, 

65 





I 



THE PICCOLO 



■A 



While his uncle, Mr. Wise, 

Shook his head with groans and sighs, 

Crying loudly, " No, no, no, boy ! 

Stop, and hear me play the hautboy ! " 

Mr. East and Mr. West, 

Mr. Good and Mr. Best, 

Mr. Grand and Mr. True 

Did illuminate our view. 

And we hope to overtake 

Mr. Pond and Mr. Lake, 

Mr. Hill and Mr. Plain, 

Mr. Field and Mr. Lane, 

Mr. Sand and Mr. Shore, 

Who have hastened on before. 

Come with us, and you shall see 

Mr. Wood and Mr. Tree, 

Mr. Branch and Mr. Plower, 

Mr. Church and Mr. Tower, 



h 



ivi 



56 



THE PICCOLO 

Mr. Castle, Mr. Hall, 

And, the very best of all, 

Friends from whom we ne'er will roam, 

Mr. House and Mr. Home. 




THE PICCOLO 



THE DISAPPOINTING TEA-PAKTY 

OOME gentlemen with funny names 
'^ Last evening came to tea 
With Uncle Job and Uncle James, 
And Aunt Kezi' and me. 

There was Mr. Hilo Hostlethwaite, 

And Jeremiah Jelly, 
And Dr. Peter Postlethwaite, 

And Simon Snuffkin Smellie. 



We knew that they were monstrous wise, 

And so we hoped to hear 
The problems and the mysteries 

Of all the world made clear : 

58 



THE PICCOLO 

For learning's bright and shining flames 

Are very dear, you see, 
To Uncle Job and Uncle James, 

And Aunt Kezi', and me. 

We took our seats around the board, 

And all our ears we lent 
To hear them pour from wisdom's hoard 

The pearls of sentiment. 

But not a pearl its lustre shed, 
No gem escaped their store ; 

For every single word they said 
Was " Thanks ! a little more ! " 



59 




THE PICCOLO 

They ate the chickens, broil and roast, 
They ate the frizzled ham, 

They fell upon the buttered toast, 
They gobbled up the jam. 

They ate, and ate, and ate, until 

There wasn't any tea 
For Uncle Job, or Uncle James, 

Or Aunt Kezi' or me. 



60 



THE PICCOLO 



NOTES ON THE NOETH AMEEICAN 

INDIAN 

npHE smiling Susquehanna, 
-*- He plays the grand planner, 
In wild and warlike manner, 

lo ! io ! io ! 
He thumps it with his nose, sir ; 
He bangs it with his toes, sir ; 
And then away he goes, sir, 

As hard as he can go. 



The trembling Tockahoopo 
Doth dwindle and doth droop, oh, 
Without his turtle soup, oh, 
At morning and at night ; 



61 




THE PICCOLO 

He sups it from a spoon, sir, 
He gazes at the moon, sir, 
He wears a blanketoon, sir, 
And is a lovely sight. 

The tusky Tuscarora 
Would feel a perfect horror 
To meet a ring-tailed roarer 

Upon his homeward road ; 
But happily they stray, my dear, 
In countries far away, my dear, 
So he may skip and play, my dear, 

Nor ever grief forebode. 



The able Abenaki, 

He will not dress in khaki, 

He will not wed a darkey, 

(Observe, the rhyme is bad !) 
62 



THE PICCOLO 

The pompous Pottawottamie 
Gives lessons in phlebotomy, 
I'm told that he does not — oh me ! 
(No other rhyme ; how sad !) 



63 




THE PICCOLO 



THE CONTUMACIOUS TEOGLODYTE 

A CONTUMACIOUS Troglodyte, 
-^—^ (You may not know what that is, quite ; 
It is a man lives in a cave, 
And does not dance, or sing, or shave. 
But far from brabbles, brawls, and bothers. 
Reflects upon the sins of others.) . 

This contumacious Troglo — what ? 
Said that before ? Well, like as not ; 
For when I get a word as fine 
As that, I like to make it mine ; 
But wherefore put me to the pain 
Of going back to start again ? 

64 



THE PICCOLO 

This contumacious Trog — I say 1 
Stop interrupting me this way ! 
Now you have put my thoughts to flight, 
And quenched my fancy's fairy light. 
All kinds of lovely things I knew, 
And did intend to tell to you, 
But now no further word I'll write 
About the contum.^ Troglodyte. 



1 The rest of the word would not go in. 



65 







THE PICCOLO 



CUEIOUS CEEATUEES 

DID you ever hear the Higglety-Hog 
Howl ? 
Did you ever hear the Grigglety-Grog 

Growl ? 
If you never heard that singular sound, 
You never will, then, I'll be bound, 
For they've both gone off to the Spanish Main, 
And never will come this way again. 

Did you ever see the Dinkery-Donk 

Dance ? 
Did you ever see the Pinkery-Ponk 

Prance ? 



^ii^ 



THE PICCOLO 



If you never saw that beautiful sight, 
They say you won't, and I think they're right. 
For they both ran after the Twoggle-cum-twig, 
And I hear he led them a terrible rig. 




..>\'M d.^^.^^uZ'' 



'/.r--*TTL -A. 



THE PICCOLO 



& ' 



THE TWOGGLE - CUM - TWIG- 

"XTOU ask me about the Twoggle-cum-twig, 
-*- Whether he's Httle or whether he's big • 
Whether he's round or whether he's square, 
Wobbled in wool or hummocked with hair : 
I cannot tell you ; I do not dare ! 

You ask me whether he squawks or squeals, 
Trips on his toes or hops on his heels, 
Studies Latin or plays the flute, 
Wears a tail on his diving-suit — 
I may not answer ; I must be mute ! 

You ask me whether he feeds on figs. 
Jam, or turnips, or scrambled wigs ; 

68 



THE PICCOLO 

Dances under the Tea-tray Tree, 
Sings " Oh, hobbledy, hobbledy gee ! " 
Ah 1 do not ask me ; it may not be ! 

'Tis one of the mysteries dark and deep ; 
'Tis one of the things that make me weep. 
'Tis one of the things that, come what may, 
I never, no, never, no never will say. 
Enough ! now leave me ; away ! away ! 



69 




THE PICCOLO 



CONCEENING THE NOBILITY 



rriHEEE was a benevolent Barooet, 

-■- Who went out to fish with a sparrow net ; 

But a whale with a jump 

Came flimpety flump, 
And he found it was rather a narrow net. 




There was a magnificent Marchioness, 
Whose character tended to starchiness ; 

But when a great King 

Said " Oo tootsicums t'ing ! " 
She softened at once into archiness. 

There was a laconical Laureate, 
Who grew thinner and thinner the more he ate ; 

70 



THE PICCOLO 

Till one terrible day 
He vanished away, 
And all on account of the store he ate. 

There was an unmannerly Mandarin 
Whose lady had hoped he would hand her in 

To dinner one day, 

But she fainted away 
When instead he escorted the gander in. 



71 




THE PICCOLO 



IN FOEEIGN PAETS 

T'TTHEN I lived in Singapore, 

^ ^ It was something of a bore 
To receive the bulky Begums who came trundling to 

my door ; 
They kept getting into tangles 
With their bingle-bongle-bangles, 
And the tiger used to bite them as he sat upon the 

floor. 

When I lived in Timbuctoo, 

Almost every one I knew 

Used to play upon the sackbut, singing " toodle-doo- 

dle, doo," 

72 




i 



THE PICCOLO 

And they made ecstatic ballads, 
And consumed seductive salads, 
Made of chicory and hickory and other things that 
grew. 

When I lived in Eotterdam, ' 

I possessed a spotted ram. 

Who would never feed on anything but hollyhocks 

and ham ; 
But one day he butted down 
All the magnates of the town. 
So they slew him, though I knew him to be gentle 

as a lamb. 







THE PICCOLO 

But! 

When I got to Kandahar, 

It was very, very far, 

And the people came and said to me, " How very 

plain you are ! " 
Sofl sailed across the foam, 
And I toddle- waddled home, 
And no more 111 go a-rovering beyond the harbor 

bar. 



74 




THE PICCOLO 



SOME SINGULAR STATEMENTS 

SHALL I tell you what happens when I go 
To stay with the Sheriff of Sligo ? 
He rides on a goat 
In a plum-colored coat, 
And my aunt Isabella says, " Why go ? " 

But that's naught to what happens when we go 
To visit the Vicar of Vigo ; 

He squints and he squeals, 

And he takes to his heels, 
And says, " Gracious ! whenever will she go ? " 

Yet think what might happen should you go 
To lodge with the Landlord of Lugo ! 

He might kick you down-stairs 

Till you needed repairs. 

And remark from the window, " Must you go ? ' 

75 




«l 



THE PICCOLO 




f- mr 






i" ••#1 -fti 

b' jU ill: f^ia £; 



I 




SOME FAMILIES OF MY ACQUAINTANCE 

npHE Kummy-jums, the Eummy-jums, 
-*- Are very funny people ; 
(Very, very, very, very, 

Very funny people !) 
They run as hard as they can go, 

And clamber up the steeple ; 
(Clamber-climber, climber-clamber, 

Clamber up the steeple ! ) 
And when they get up to the top, 
They say " Good gracious ! we must stop ! " 
And turn about with grief and pain. 
And clamber-climber down again. 

The Viddipocks, the Viddipocks, 
Have very pretty bonnets ; 

76 



THE PICCOLO 

(Very, very, very, very, 

Very pretty bonnets ! ) 
And when they wear them upside down. 

They write most lovely sonnets ; 
(Lovely-dovely, dovely-lovely, 

Lovely-dovely sonnets ! ) 
And sitting on the new-mown hay. 
They wirble-warble all the day ; 
" For oh ! " they say, " at such a time. 
Our very ribbons flow in rhyme ! " 



The Wiggle-wags, the Wiggle-wags, 
They never know their mind, sir ; 
(Never, never, never, never. 

Never know their mind, sir ! ) 
Sometimes they hook their frocks before, 

And sometimes up behind, sir ; 
(Hook them, crook them, crook them, hook 
them, 

77 



THE PICCOLO 

Hook them up behind, sir ! ) 
And first they turn them inside out, 
Then outside-inside with a shout ; 
" For oh ! " they say, " there's no one knows 
Which way the most our beauty shows ! " 



78 



THE PICCOLO 



A SPANISH BALLAD 

(To be sung to the guitar) 

A GENTLEMAN in fair Madrid 
■^^■^ He loved a lovely maid, he did ; 
Of all the maids the pearl and pink, 
Oh, tink-a-tink-a-tink-a-tink ! 



He followed her both near and far. 
Performing on his light guitar ; 
And often at her feet he sank, 
Oh, tank-a-tank-a-tank-a-tank ! 

But she remained both grim and grave ; 
" I wish," she said, " you would behave ! " 
And so he went and was a monk. 

Oh, tunk-a-tunk-a-tunk-a-tunk ! 

79 




TEE PICCOLO 



THE AEMADILLO 



A MORAL TALE 



"y^OUNG Waldemar Fitzwillow 
-*- Possessed an armadillo, 

Which was both his glory and his pride ; 
And when he took his nap, he 
Was seldom quite so happy 

As when the creature slumbered by his side. 



One day while he was sleeping, 
His enemy came creeping, 

(His name was Parker Paracelsus Pell ! ) 
And with a fiendish chuckle, 
Likewise a belt and buckle. 

He whacked the armadillo on the shell. 

80 







r ' 



THE PICCOLO 

The armadillo uttered 

A dismal groan, and squuttered ; 

(That means to amble mournfully away ; ) 
The enemy did follow, 
With flout, and shout, and hollo, 

And drove the harmless creature down the way. 



But Waldemar Fitzwillow, 
Upstarting from his pillow, 

Exclaimed, " That armadillo, sir, is mine ! " 
And with a gesture splendid 
His brief remarks he ended. 

By cleaving Paracelsus to the chine. 



81 







THE PICCOLO 



MORAL 



Be kind to armadillos, 

When sleeping on their pillows, 

And whack them not uugently on the shell ; 
Or you may be dismembered 
Before you have remembered 

The fate of Parker Paracelsus Pell. 



82 



THE PICCOLO 



FANCY DRESS 

T'M going to make a fancy dress, 

-*- The fashion o't you ne'er would guess. 

I'll take the cloth from the Dutchman's Breeches, 

I'll pluck some Stitch wort to make the stitches, 

And with pine-needles I will sew. 

Backward and forward, to and fro. 



I'll trim it all with Goldthread fine. 

The Bachelor's Buttons shall be mine, 

And here and there, in proper place, 

I'll set Queen Anne her fairy Lace. 

And then, if pleasant be the weather, 

I'll trim my hat with a Prince's Feather : 

Maybe you'll think, when you look on me, 

" Morning Glory " my name should be. 

83 





THE PICCOLO 



ME. PETEE POOK 

1% /TE. PETEE POOK 
-^■^ And Mr. Sammy Snook, 
They went to hunt for pilly winks 
Beside the meadow brook. 

Mr. Peter 

Met a skeeter, 
Scared him 'most to death, poor creatur' I 

Mr. Sammy 

Met a lammie, 
Screamed and ran to tell his Mammy : 
They will never more, methinks, 

Go a-hunting pillywinks. 




84 



THE PICCOLO 



SLEEPY SONG 

T)LACK curls and gold curls, 
-*-^ Lyiug on my knee, 
Black curls and gold curls. 
Lovely for to see ; 

" Sing a song, sing a song, 
Little mother, do ! 
Singing time is come now, 
Sleepy time, too ! " 



Hushaby, Gold-top ! 

Hushaby, dear ! 
Far in the west now 

The sun sinks clear. 

85 



THE PICCOLO 

Purple for his pillow, 

Coverlet of gold ; 
Soon shall you slumber too, 

In soft sheets rolled. 

Hushaby, Black-cap ! 

Hushaby, love ! 
See the httle cloud-lambs 

Curl themselves above ! 



In the fields of heaven 
Fast asleep they lie ; 

Soon shall you slumber too, 
So by-low-by ! 




Jb'Jcpt«iNt ZE>T». uce . 



THE PICCOLO 

Hushaby, darlings, 

Hushaby now ! 
See the little twinkle-stars 

Lighting all a-row ! 

All the night they dance, dance, 
All the day they sleep ; 

Now while you slumber true, 
Their watch they keep. 




THE PICCOLO 



GEIPPE 




"^^TEVER had it ? then the world is all before you ! 
Just recovered ? then there's naught for me to 
tell. 
But for me, I've just arisen 
From a grim and grippy prison, 
And desire in me is welling 
All the world to be a-telling 
Of my singular sensations, 
My extreme exacerbations, 
My unbounded irritations 
And intense exasperations. 

First of all, a sudden shiver, 
Like a ripple on the river, 

your marrow all a-quiver, 

88 



,7c, v r.-,'.«.7iR^ce. 



THE PICCOLO 

Without any cause whatever. 
And from thence go hurry-scurry, 
Helter-skelter, flirry-flurry, 
Darting, little icy particles 
Through the nine and thirty articles, 
(Rather more or rather less,) 
That your body may possess. 
And your teeth begin to chatter, — 
Though the speech is no great matter - 
Half a groan and half a grumble, 
As the shawls you clutch and fumble. 
And you cower, shaking, quaking, 
When — your teeth set up an aching ! 
Cuspid, molar, each one taking 
His peculiar line of devilry. 
As in some infernal revelry. 

m 

With a throbbing and a jobbing, 
And a driving and a riving, 



89 



/ ' 



THE PICCOLO 

And a stabbing and a jabbing, 
And a jerking and a dirking, 
As if all were Greek-and-Turking, 
And a nagging and a jagging, 
And a darting and a smarting, 
As of soul and body parting. 
Then your head takes up the story, 
Crying, " I will ache for glory ! 
I will ache with such an aching 
As the world shall be awaking ; 
Fame shall sit upon my banner. 
To have ached in such a manner ! " 
And it aches ! till every brain-cell 
Is transfigured to a pain-cell ; 
Till cerebrum, cerebellum, 
To balloons of anguish swell 'em. 
And medulla oblongata 
Wears the crown of saint and martyr. 

90 



THE PICCOLO 

Then your knees ache ; and your nose aches ; 
And each smallest of your toes aches ; 
And your throat's a ring of iron 
Which your tongue lies parched and dry on ; 

Now your feet they fall from under ! 
Now your backbone drops asunder ! 
Now your whole articulation 
Creaks and groans like all creation, 
As a wave of fever fills you, 
And engulfs you and enthrills you, 
Till you sink beneath the billows, 
Sink, and clutching at the pillows, 
Cry, as reason 'gins to totter, 
" Eun, oh ! run for Dr. Potter ! " 



01 




THE PICCOLO 



THE SQUIEEEL OF CENTEAL PAEK 

~F AM the squirrel of Central Park ; 

-^ (Hop, skip, and .away ! ) 

Here in the daylight, there in the dark. 

Gaily I frolic and play. 
Give me a nut, and quick I'll take it, 
Never a pause to bite and break it ; 
Off now, a snug little hole to make it ; 

(Hop, skip, and away ! ) 

I am the squirrel of Central Park ! 

(Hurry, scurry, and hop ! ) 
See me go rattling over the bark, 

Up to the tree's tip-top ! 

High on the branches swinging, swinging, 

Light and tight as the bird that's wiuging ; 

Don't even envy the song he's singing ; 

(Hurry, scurry, and hop ! ) 

92 



THE PICCOLO 

I am the squirrel of Central Park ! 

(Chatter, chatter, and cheep ! ) 
Sometimes I peer through the leaves and mark 
Prisoners here they keep. 
Who'd be a grizzly, mountains high, 
There under bolts and chains to lie ? 
Gay little King of the Park am I ; 

(Chatter, chatter, and cheep ! ) 



93 




TEE PICCOLO 



SUPPOSITIONS 

/~\II ! if I were a spotty giraffe, 
^^ How do you s'pose that I should laugh ? 
Hi! 
He! 
Ha! 
Ho! 
Gurgling down the laugh would go. 
Hubble and bubble, and get into trouble, 
And find its way out at the end of my toe. 

Oh ! If I were an alligaz^or. 

How do you s'pose that I should snore ? 

Hunk ! 

Punk ! 

Wunk ! 

Squunk ! 
94 



THE PICCOLO 

The snore would run into my teeth, ker-chunk 
My teeth would ache, and I should wake, 
And probably tumble right out of my bunk. 

Oh ! if I were a cinnamon bear. 
How do you s'pose I should curl my hair ? 

Frizzly, 
Sizzly, 

Hire a grizzly, 
(Send him a cab if the weather were drizzly,) 
Twist it round a coyote's tail, 
And pin it up with a tenpeuny nail. 





THE PICCOLO 



THE MEADOW SONG 

T) EDTOP, timothy, June-grass, and clover, 
-■-^ Sing the merry meadow song over and over 
Bobolinks a-trilling through it, 
Little breezes thrilling through it, 
Just to-day, 
Care away. 
And I'll be a rover. 

Eedtop, timothy, herd's-grass, and daisy, 
Hear the merry meadow song, laughing and lazy ! 
Grasshoppers a-chirring through it, 
Jolly quakers whirring through it, 
Midges small 
Over all, 
Dancing till they're crazy. 

96 



THE PICCOLO 

Eed top, timothy, buttercup and rye-grass, 
How the merry meadow song ripples through the 
high grass ! 
. Golden cups a-dancing in it. 
Golden sunlight glancing in it, 
Garden-plot 
Clean forgot, 
I'm content with my grass ! 



'm 






« 




THE PICCOLO 



NEVEEMOEE 

/^H ! nevermore 

^-^ On yonder shore, 

I'll hear the Woggle-something roar : 

(The Woggle- which ? the Woggle-what ? 

The creature's name I have forgot ! ) 

Oh ! nevermore, oh ! nevermore ! 

Oh ! isn't that a horrid bore ? 

Oh ! nevermore, behind the door, 
I'll hear the Snoozle-poozle snore ; 
The Snoozle gray, the Snoozle grim. 
The Snoozle deaf and dank and dim ; 
Oh ! nevermore, oh ! nevermore ! 
Oh ! isn't that a horrid bore ? 

98 



THE PICCOLO 

Oh ! nevermore, my cot before, 
111 watch the Kettletumpkin soar ; 
The Kettletump, a feathered frump, 
That flutters round my aged pump ; 
Oh ! nevermore, oh ! nevermore ! 
Oh ! isn't that a hideous bore ? 



99 




fliiiiinMiii!iin:iil!MiJiii|iiiiwiliiiii|iii||| 



'■1 


m 


c 




— 


if 



THE PICCOLO 



AFTEK A VISIT TO THE NATUEAL 
HISTOEY MUSEUM 

rnmS is the Wlggledywastlcus ; 
-■- Very remarkable beast. 
Nose to tail an eighth of a raile ; 
Took him an acre or two to smile ; 
Took him a quarter 'f an hour to wink ; 
Swallowed a pond for his morning drink. 
Oh ! would it had been vouchsafed to us 
Upon the Wiggledywasticus 
Our wondering eyes to feast ! 

This is the Ptoodlecumtumpsydyl ; 

Eather unusual bird. i 

Had a mouth before and behind : I 

Ate whichever way he'd a mind ; 

100 




g^sepM/M tlEsRi^ci . 






I 



THE PICCOLO 

Spoiled his digestion, so they say, 
Pindled and dwindled quite away, 
Or else he might have been living still, 
The singular Ptoodlecumtumpsydyl ; 
A pity, upon my word ! 

This is the Ichthyosnortoryx ; 

Truly astonishing fish ; 
Used to snort in a terrible way ; 
Scared the lobsters to death they say : 
Had a nose like a tea-kettle spout. 
Broke it snorting, and so died out. 
Sad ! if he hadn't got into this fix. 
We might have made of the 'Snortoryx 

A very acceptable dish. 



103 




TUE PICCOLO 



DESEET SONG 



"TIST the Desert of Sahara, 
J- Tiddy hi, tiddy ho ; 
In the Desert of Sahara, 

Tiddy hum ; 
The sands are red and yellow, 
And the camels snort and bellow, 
And the African is beating of his drum, drum, drum. 
And the African is beating of his drum. 

The lion is a-roaring, 

Tiddy hi, tiddy ho. 
And the vulture is a-s oaring, 

Tiddy hum ; 
And the handy little jackal 
Is a- waiting with his pack all. 

And the African is beating of his drum, drum, drum, 
And the African is beating of his drum. 

104 



THE PICCOLO 



The Bedouin is riding, 

Tiddy hi, tiddy ho. 
And the ostriches are hiding, 

Tiddy hum ; 
And at sight of an oasis 
You sit down and say " Good gracis ! " 
And the African is beating of his drum, drum, drum, 
And the African is beating of his drum. 

Oh ! the Desert of Sahara, 

Tiddy hi, tiddy ho. 
Shall we go there, mia cava, 

Tiddy hum ; 
No ! we'll stay where we belong, 
So I'll end my little song. 

While the African is beating of his drum, drum, drum. 
While the African is beating of his drum. 



106 




THE PICCOLO 



A BEIEF BALLAD OF AEABY 

XN Araby, in Araby, in Araby the blest, 

-■" There lived a man who thought he'd like 

To travel to the west. 

On a lumpy humpy camel he 

Departed with his family, 

His uncle's name was Sammy Lee, 

But I forget the rest. 

From Araby, from Araby, 

From Araby the free. 

They amble-ramble-gambolled 

Till they came unto the sea. 

But the camel could not swim, you know, 

It disagreed with him, you know, 

106 



THE PICCOLO 

He waved his hinder limb, you know, 
And yelled ferociously. 

To Araby, to Araby, 

To Araby the fair. 

They turned their faces home again 

In anguish and despair. 

But the camel, they'd such grief of him, 

They wished to find relief of him, 

And so they made corned beef of him. 

And ate him then and there. 




THE PICCOLO 



THE TABLES TUENED 



"VTOW this is the story of our little boy Jock ; 
•^ ^ How, climbing forbidden fences, 
He met with a monstrous big turkey-cock, 
Who scared him most out of his senses. 




For " Gobble, gobble, gobble ! " said the Turkey-cock, 
And he spread his tail like a fan, sir ; 

But this was too much for our little boy Jock, 
And off like a shot he ran, sir. 

Oh, Jock ran here and Jock ran there, 

And the Turkey-cock ran after ; 
And this one screamed in a wild despair. 

And t'other one shook with laughter. 

108 



THE PICCOLO 

For, " Gobble, gobble, gobble ! " said the Turkey-cock, 
And he swelled as big as the shed, sir ; 

But off to his mother ran poor little Jock, 
And hid in her apron his head, sir. 

Thanksgiving came, and our little boy Jock 
At Grandmamma's table was sitting ; 

And there was the very same Turkey-cock, 
In a posture more seemly and fitting. 

And " Gobble, gobble, gobble ! " went our little boy 
Jock, 

And he waved his fork and his knife, sir ; 
But never a word said the Turkey-cock, 

For he'd done with the follies of life, sir. 



109 




THE PICCOLO 



A SUGGESTION 



for a possible volume to be called " the young 
ehymester's companion." 



TTTHAT are the words that rhyme with 3foon / 

' ^ Not June, 

Nor Tune ! 

For M-0-0, {douUe / ) N, Moon, 

The suitable rhymes may be told full soon. 

You may beg of your Sov'reign a gracious Boon ; 

You may crack a jest with a bold Buffoon, 

In a motley cap and a pied Pantaloon, 

On a deep divan in a splendid Saloon. 

Or play a jig on an old Bassoon, 

Or fire a shot at a crafty Coon, 

Or dance a quadrille with a blue Baboon. 

110 




Jo s ePH /N e- Sp7?.u ce. 



THE PICCOLO 

Or if you're a Scot, you can Busk and Boune, 
(Not forgetting to put on your cork-heeled Shoon ! ) 
And arming yourself with a Musketoou, 
Or (if you prefer it,) a stout Spontoon, 
Can join with some others to form a Platoon, 
And chasing some rascally Picaroon, 
Come down on him like the swift Typhoon : 
Harry him, drive him across a Pontoon, 
Shrieking and squeaking, the " cream-faced Loon ! " — 
Your scoundrel is ever the worst Poltroon ! — 
Then smashing the bridge, leave him there a Ma- 
roon, 
For he can't get away, as he has no Balloon. — 
You are weary and faint ? 'tis the hour of Noon ! 
You say sit by the side of Bonnie Doon, 
And rest; and nibble a Macaroon. 
Or meeting a Lovely One — something Aroon, — 
Who's been reading your verses and dropped in a 

Swoon, 

113 



THE PICCOLO 



May revive her with syllabub out of a Spoon. 
An oh ! but she'll think you a gay Gossoon, 
As a ballad soft in her ear you Croon, 
Exclusively made up of rhymes to Moon ! 



114 




THE PICCOLO 



THE SAD TALE OF ME. BOBSTEK AND 
MISS PEAWNY PEIM 

11 /TE. BOBSTEE 

jJIA. i^^g ^ lobster, 

Lived beneath a rock. 
Miss Prawny Prim 
Made eyes at him, 
Which did his feelings shock. 
" Oh, my claws, Ma'am ! 
Social laws. Ma'am, 
Such-Hke acts taboo. 
You should have waited until I 
Held out my claw to you." 

Mr. Bobster 
Did his nob stir, 
115 



THE PICCOLO 

Shook it in disgust. 
Miss Prawny Prim 
Made mouths at him, 
And called him " Cross old Crust." 
" Oh, my shell. Ma'am ! 
Hear me tell, Ma'am ! 
This I cannot stand. 
If thus things be 
Beneath the sea, 
What must they be on land ? " 




THE PICCOLO 

Mr. Bobster, 

Angry lobster, 

Left his shelt'ring cave ; 

Miss Prawny Prim 

Threw stones at him, 

And chased him through the wave. 

Such behaving 

Set him raving ; 

Sooner die than not. 

And so he went and threw himself 

Into a lobster-pot. 



117 



THE PICCOLO 



JEEEMI' AND JOSEPHINE 

A S Jeremi' and Josephine 
^^--^ Were walky-talking on the green, 
They met a man who bore a dish 
Of (anything you hke to wish ! ) 

They stared to see the man so bold ; 
They really thought he must be cold, 
For he was clad, though chill the day, 
In (anything you choose to say ! ) 

The man returned their stare again ; 
But now the story gives me pain, 
For he remarked in scornful tone, 
(I'll let you manage this alone 1 ) 

118 



TEE PICCOLO 

And there is even worse to come ; 
The man (I've been informed by some,) 
Inflicted on the blameless two 
(I leave the punishment to you ! ) 

This simple tale is thus, you see, 
Divided fair 'twixt you and me. 
And nothing more I've heard or seen 
Of Jeremi' or Josephine. 














V '• 



.1-' 



'A-. 



v//. 



.'//. 



//<.,'• 



^k^L 



. josepH(Ne.:E>-R.oce. 



THE PICCOLO 



THE UNCLE OE CATO THEOPHILUS JONES 

rilHE uncle of Cato Theophilus Jones, 
-^ He sang to his lute in tumultuous tones, 
" Oh ! twanklety twinklety twanklety twee, 
The young Georgiaua is lovely to see ! " 

The young Georgiana (her surname was Grout,) 
Possessed a Papa who was savage and stout ; 
He heard from his window the tremulous tones 
Of the uncle of Cato Theophilus Jones. 

" Now list ! " said the parent ; " now listen and hark ! 
Who is it that's warbling thus in the dark ? 
' Oh ! twanklety twinklety twanklety twee. 
The young Georgiana is winsome and wee ! ' " 

120 




THE PICCOLO 



He seized on a pitcher both ample and full, 
And emptied the same on the troubadour's skull, 
And the sweet summer evening was filled with the 

groans 
Of the uncle of Cato Theophilus Jones. 

The maiden may linger and listen full long, 
But she never will hear the last words of the song, 
" Oh ! twanklety twinklety twanklety twee. 
The young Georgiaua my true-love shall be ! " 



THE END. 



121 





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